Are Pizzas The Future Food? | Writing | Food Newsie

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Are Pizzas The Future Food?

Are Pizzas The Future Food?

So, this is wierd. Futurists often try to predict Convergence: BIOLOGY “The tendency of unrelated animals and plants to evolve superficially similar characteristics under similar environmental conditions.” It also applies to the spontaneous generation of self-aware Artificial Intelligence and subsequent generations – but in Food News, it seems environmental conditions are tending toward Pizza, robots and automated delivery. I didn’t see this forecast in Blade Runner, Minority Report or even Futurama, but here are the indicators…

Despite prohibitive costs (like those pricy targets unmet that are shuttering Lily, hopeful maker of flying camera drones even after $34,000,000 dollars worth of pre-orders) and increasing regulations by the FAA, everyone’s tinkering with drones that will essentially air lift cargo and deliveries to your door. Alphabet, Google’s proper controlling entity, is the only group to famously cancel their look at solar power drones and move onward though they are keeping their wifi balloons to enable internet access where there otherwise is none. So with the skies perhaps clearing, it’s still pretty clear to see that in ten years, drivers will be competing for space on the roads.

Are Pizzas The Future Food?

Soon, it'll be stranger than strangers coming to pick you up when you call for an Uber. Uber's self-driving premium taxi will put a lot of work-at-car drivers out of work and Tesla is following suit. Before long, you won't fully OWN your self driving Tesla, you'll lease permission to use it when it's not busy operating as a self-driving taxi. For whom it earns has yet to be disclosed.

Nearly every high-end auto maker is teaming up with tech companies to generate self-driving technology. Microsoft and Tesla and a slew of others are forcing the Department of Transportation to work on creating new rules for busier roads navigated by robots.

The automation revolution might be peaking at the automotive level, but it’s cutting its teeth at the consumer level. Where consumers aren’t forced to serve themselves like at those terribly impersonal little frozen yogurt places I’ve seen where flavors are just sticks on the wall to pull and toppings round out a by-the-pound pay system, robots are tasked with the grunt work. August 2016 saw Xavier University in Cincinnati install a Pizza ATM much to the coverage delight of local news outlets everywhere. College and Pizza: Makes sense. We’ve all been in the hungry place where ordering pizza seemed the most practical decision. French Pizza ATM maker, Paline is poised to plant that robo-pizza flag solidly in the United States in 2017. With just three minutes of turn around time and a 70-pizza capacity, the early models tease just enough to test the market and hold just enough to ‘deliver’ on proof of concept. Even Cosmopolitan hashtagged the news of more pending Pizza ATMs as BLESSED in a recent post rekindling the spirit of ‘easy’ and ‘tasty’ combined with unavoidalbe mentions of the future of food.

Here’s something interesting GrubStreet noted, that “for some reason, (Paline) will require those who buy machines to visit Xavier’s Pizza Chef School for training.” NOTE that Xavier link is located at PALINE.com – ??? A quick read on that curiosity shows three courses, each at TWELVE-HUNDRED DOLLARS a day per person possibly adding up to five days if you enroll in all three, A, B and C! Wow. That seems a Fleecing to me, but hey, pizza futures can’t be free. I just didn’t know they’d be $6,000 per “Expert.”

Are Pizzas The Future Food?

There's quite a lot riding on that pizza ATM pony but this ATM school might help balance some spread sheets. Were the idea to really blossom, you can fall asleep more sure that when you wake up tomorrow, there will be other, equally fleece-like gimmicks to certify other ridiculous-to-certify tasks at such eyebrow raising prices.

Add to this stunning pizza revelation the newest pizza revelation to tip the shark from Mountain View, California: Zume Pizza is Baked in the Van on the Way To Your Door which is completely neccessary danger on the streets. Alphabet’s neighbor, Zume Pizza, has been at collecting money as a start-up since June 2016. Why the tech corridor Mountain View, California for a pizza place? The co-founder is Alex Garden. He was hired to become President of Zynga Studios with a start date of May 2014. Since April 2016 Alex Garden returned to a Canadian Game Developer as CEO. In 2016 Garden founded Zume Pizza – If Zynga sounds familiar, it’s because they brought you FarmVille, CityVille and Zynga Poker. Their tiff with Facebook over payments in games brought the two groups to agreement from 2010 to 2015 at which time the icy five year rift opened. In February 2016, Zynga said that it planned to sell its headquarters in San Francisco, a property last assessed at over $238 million. So why all this Alex Garden, techno backstory in food?

Fortune.com has a three minute video showing the human and robot creation of pizzas and it would take a guy like Garden to tech-up food. Another interesting component to this big picture is GrubStreet’s claim that 2017 is the year of the square pizza posted this morning and furthering our search for Convergence in the following way: While circles and spheres are nice and neat and stackable, squares and cubes are more on the money for shipping and transport. Ask a watermelon which CUBED for the sake of easier storage in Japan for small refrigerators. The story credits the square pie’s strength and hints at Detroit’s very slowly up-and-coming comeback (which we’re rooting for hardcore) but misses the square pizza’s role as it plays into auditioning to be the food of the future. Less wasted space between product means more bang for the buck both in storage and delivery.

Here’s a fun look for futurist lovers… The futurists who worked with Spielberg on Minority Report got a lot right. In November 2016, they got together again to swing with an aim toward education. Hollywood invades Tempe presents, Inventing the Future All Over Again hosted by Arizona State University. With their help, Spielberg got a future based not only on “cool” but reality too.

So why pizza?

We’ve tied autonomous travel, tech and food prep and en route custom-ordered cooking and, much to our surprise, easily discovered Convergence. But why pizza of all things? Classically a college relief food, pizza’s reputation is far from being haute cuisine like we’re being shown on Netflix’s Chef’s Table series where food trends of the future come from all around the globe but rarely include anything resembling the oven-baked breadbasket topped with anything you can picture. So this is where we make the leap/argument. The Future Food must not only get tech-friendly but answer evolving crisis like water shortages, power consumption considerations, access to food deserts and be cost effective enough to reach even the poorest dining rooms or sofas or dorms. Burgers and Fries don’t cut it when you consider the myriad of toppings pizzas can taxi.

It just makes sense to add to our daily bread any vegetable, meat, protein, vegetable, sauce and/or tomato concoction an imagination can muster. Water usage is at a minimum; heat from the delivery source can be utilized for cooking rather than wasted; pizzas readily take most any shape (like the square thereby beating out the circle’s inefficiency of space) and typically, starches and associated carbs and sugars don’t make much of a regular appearance in pizza which counts for our argument since we see so much concern about the negative roles carbs and sugars play in health headlines these days.

While the future will be more than 30 minutes in coming, it looks less and less like a pie-in-the-sky idea to think of what you can do to jump aboard the self-making, self-delivering unlikely nutrition-hero Future Food of Pizza.

Are Pizzas The Future Food?

Wait, no Pineapple?

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